Emotional Issues of Growing Up
Puberty affects the whole family. Your daughter may experience an easy, carefree adolescence, or she may wrestle with emotional issues the whole way. Below are some issues your daughter might encounter, along with ways to help her cope with them.
- Moods can swing as hormones fluctuate. Be supportive and positive. Listen to her when she shares her concerns.
- Teenage girls are going to worry about their appearance, especially as compared to their friends and classmates. Remind her that she’s beautiful both inside and out. Praise her for academic, athletic and extracurricular achievements, too.
- Difference in the timing of development can become an emotional issue, especially for early developers and late bloomers. The best thing to do is to reinforce a positive physical and emotional self-image for your daughter.
- During puberty, kids start to develop independence. They want space from their parents. This is normal. Don’t take it personally if your kids want more room to grow. Respect their privacy, but be available to them. Despite what they say, your kids still need you.
- Friendships, even those forged in the playpen, may change as kids figure out who they are. Encourage your daughter to be herself and to enjoy a variety of friends.
- Girls may start noticing boys and develop crushes, either on someone in their class or on a celebrity or teacher. Exploring romantic feelings is part of the road to adulthood, but let kids know that they are probably not emotionally ready for a serious relationship at this point in their lives.
If you found this helpful, these articles and forums might help, too:
Article: Your Daughter’s Body Image
Article: Physical Changes During Puberty
What others are saying
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Tammy, 6/2/2008 1:51:33 PM
grrrrreat! -
Micaela, 6/3/2008 2:34:22 PM
I wish my mom knew this! If you are a mom, pay attention to this. -
anonimus..., 6/7/2008 11:07:28 AM
yah... if ur a mom please please realize girls NOW r different from girls back when u were a teen... -
kiki, 6/9/2008 2:38:57 PM
what do i do i just got my period my mom doesnt know .HELP.my mom only uses tampons and i dont know how to use them im scared -
tiffany, 6/19/2008 3:11:16 PM
don,t feel bad. -
Clare, 6/21/2008 4:00:22 PM
Yeah, my mom never gave me the talk. I would have appreciated it because i started my period when i was 10, i was scared.. all the mothers,, take notice! -
girl08, 7/13/2008 10:28:36 PM
to "kiki" talk to your mom! she's been through it too, she knows how you feel and whats best for you. when i got mine i was home alone and had to tell my mum later luckily i had things there because i think my mom was expecting me to get them soon. as i said just tell her that way she can buy you pads and tampons or whatever your comfortable with -
Tammie, 7/25/2008 9:37:03 AM
To kiki, I ama a mom and my daughter got her period this week, she did not know what was going on.... but when she came to me we talked and i exlained to her what she needed to know. So, if you don't tell your mom she will not know how you feel about what your body is going through. EVEN about the tampons. We (my dauhgter and I started out with pantyliners.....Hope this will help. TALK TO HER!!!!!!!!! IT HELPS!! -
Allie, 7/30/2008 3:13:17 PM
Im 14 and when I got my period I was 13. I had started the night before fair day and I was so excited. My mom had gotten me some pads for when it started. I learned how to use them by my self. The next day I told her that I had started my period and she was very proud of me. Just hope you dont have to go to the fair on the first day of your period. It is extremly hot and you get very cranky. If you think you are going to start your period then you need to tell your mom to get you some pads that way you will be ready. If you have already started your period then you need to tell your mom or dad that way they can get you some supplies.
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Juliet , 9/17/2008 6:21:26 PM
So i asked my mom about periods. she answered them and wanted t know why i asked alll the sudden. itold her i got this website and it told me everything. but since shes a nurse she was offended that i went to a website instead of asking her sooner! she took it the wrong way and i told her i was talking to my friend about it and she said thts a inapprpiate thing to talk about with freinds she dont want me to be friends with lauren anymore D: i though talking to gal pals was a good thing cause theyare the smae sex as you and you feel more cofortable talking with them about anything. so whats hould i tell my mom? -
Angie, 9/23/2008 10:43:15 AM
Juliet I'm a mom of a 14 year old. I think that your mom maybe hurt that you didn't feel that you could come to her first. She may be having trouble thinking of her little girl growing up. I know it made me see my girl in a different way but a good way. Give your mom some time to get use to the idea. And if you still have trouble talking to her maybe you could talk to one of your friend's mom. I have helped my daughter's friend before. Hope this eases your mind some. Good Luck and its great that you feel comfortable talking to your gal pals about such important things. Try to keep the communication open if possible. -
to Juliet, 9/27/2008 10:31:22 AM
i talk with my friends about it anytime. It can make you feel better about what your going through and you get to hear some of their stories. i think that she is overreacting a little and you should let her cool off. i think that its ok to talk about this with friends, sometimes they have good advice. don't stop being friends with lauren anytime soon, she may change her mind and realize how irrational she was being when she told you that. -
Blessel, 11/13/2008 12:21:44 PM
Thanks to Stacey for sharing this website... this is a big help in my part... -
anna, 11/20/2008 4:17:14 PM
to juliet i think it good to talk to your friends about it because they are going through the same thing but i also think you should talk to your mom because she has already gone through it and would be able to answer your questions but you could talk to your friends too -
terri, 12/11/2008 8:26:03 PM
I am a mom of a 9 year old and an 11 year old. I have been talking to them for the last 6 years. I never had “the talk” with my mom and I don’t want my girls to be as lost as I was. Moms are not the enemy, I would hope that all young ladies who have a mom in their life have one that will listen to them and try to help them understand what is going on with them. Girls if you can’t talk to your mom find an adult that you can talk to, and maybe they can help you talk with your mom. My mom wouldn’t talk with me; I remember talking with one of my aunts. Now at 40 years old my mom still won’t talk with me. I have been talking with my co-workers who have gone threw menopause already (it’s not that far off now) for the moms: if your daughter does not feel comfortable talking to you at lest be happy that they are trying to learn what is going on. Yes the 13/14 year old friends may not be he best place to get information, but they are going threw the same thing as your daughters. As I said I have been talking with my girls for the last 6 years (now 11 & 9) I want to think that if they do not talk with me they will talk with another adult who does know the correct information to talk about; and that I will be OK with that. I want them to be educated-by a safe adult. -
sierra, 1/7/2009 5:22:21 PM
omg i love this me and my mom talk about this same stuff!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! -
Shannon, 1/30/2009 8:14:29 PM
My daughter just turned 11 and we're still waiting for the "day" - I've talked to her about it since she was 4 or 5; she has always been very inquisitive and I am happy she feels she can ask me anything. What I am concerned about is her mood swings, she rarely ever cried much, but lately she's been getting so CRANKY and she yells at her younger sister much more often than she used to. i hope this doesn't get any worse! -
Lisa, 3/21/2009 1:20:26 PM
My daughter just started her first period, 20 days before her 13th bday. She hates it. She is so sad and depressed. She doesnt want to grow up. To make matters worse she is going on her long awaited school camp in 2 days time. -
courtney, 4/23/2009 7:45:07 PM
to juliet:
me and my friends talk about periods and what we go through all the time i am 13 and in 7th grade. i got mine when i was 11 in 5th grade.
its easier to talk to them about it, because they are the same age as you, you can tell them basically everything. its not an inappropriate thing to talk about. its something all girls can relate to. so tell her that. its defiantly one thing we talk about at every sleepover we have. (one of us usually has it lol there are 9 of us)
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