Your daughter’s first date

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By the Dot Girl™ Moms

Just like with any new activity you teach your daughter, dating and how to develop trusting relationships with the opposite sex will require more than one lesson. Here’s an opportunity to look at your daughter’s first date not as one big step but rather one in-between step for which you have prepared her for since the start of puberty.

Regardless of the fact that you have determined a minimum age requirement for your daughter to begin dating doesn’t mean that she won’t be interested earlier or that she will be emotionally ready at that predetermined age. But you can expect that at some point she will show an interest in boys so be ready with your calmest its-just-another-part-of-growing-up reaction.

Let your daughter know that it is OK to be “just friends” with boys. This is a great way for her to feel like she can be herself without any romantic expectations. Friendships with the opposite sex formed before middle school can be beneficial in later teen years when your daughter does start to date. She’ll have the support of male friends who have known her over a period of time and may not be so disappointed by the relationships that don’t last.

Allow your daughter to socialize with boys but as with anything set clear limits and guidelines. For example, no entertaining in the bedroom or late night phone calls. It may help your daughter to know that her peers have similar limits so talk to the parents of her friends, girls and boys alike. Parents can also collaborate to provide structured and supervised activities for girls and boys to socialize together such as a regular movie night or pizza party in someone’s home. The next step may be group dating where several boys and girls go out together but not necessarily as couples. Here’s another chance to socialize with the opposite sex without the pressures and expectations of one-on-one dating.

When your daughter is ready for one-on-one dating you can rest assured that you have prepared her for this step. Keep the lines of communication open and stay involved in her life. Continue fostering your daughters’ personal interests so that she has a strong sense of herself and always encourage her to be true to herself in all of her relationships.

About the Dot Girl™ Moms

Two sisters, Terri and Kathy, founded Dot Girl™ First Period Products. Who better than two women who are also daughters and mothers to honestly address an uncomfortable topic?

Their motivation to create The Dot Girl's First Period Kit™ grew from their own awkward teenage experiences. Despite the fact that their mother was a wonderful nurturer to four daughters, she was never comfortable talking to them about their bodies. They found that this is more often the rule than the exception for both moms and dads. And the reality today is that parents often find themselves in the awkward position of having avoided the subject at all costs, to the detriment of their daughters.

Terri and Kathy's goal is to provide parents with the tools they need to explain the basics of menstruation to their daughters. And for the girls, they hope to lessen their anxiety about their first period and instead turn it into a positive experience. For more information, please visit www.dotgirlproducts.com.

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What others are saying.

cathy, 11/1/2009 11:10:06 AM
this helps me so much. my hubby says for her to date @ 20 but thanks to this (which he also read) he went down to 16. my daughter catie will be soooooooooooooo happy because she 14 now!

Ruth, 11/7/2009 8:24:11 AM
We encourage our 17 year old daughter to have lots of friendships with guys, because we think that dating opens up a can of worms - having to commit to "going steady" hurts her other friendships and is distracting to school and life in general. We have discussed wtih her that marriage is the time for those sort of commitments. Also, there is the pressure of being tempted to go too far.
She has seen evidences of the things I just mentioned and is understanding our wisdom more and more.

Angelica , 11/8/2009 12:17:11 AM
I wish my parents would agree with this but they are old fashion and wouldn't agree. This is an article i want to keep to be a perfect mom someday...

Janet, 11/9/2009 9:27:24 AM
I appreciate having this article made avaialble amongst all of the pressures for young people to get out there so early. My daughter is 18 now and finishing up her senior year. She realizes that a relationship now would complicate her plans in finishing school so she tells her peers that she is not ready. Kudos to her for standing up against peer pressure and understanding that dating can come later in life when you are considering the possiblity of marriage.

Bella , 11/11/2009 5:41:48 PM
Wow I'm 13 and my parents let me date! 16 is wayyy to late. In my opinion lol. Just remeber take it slow with guys and tell your parents about friendships so they kno ur comfortable around them.

bianca, 11/12/2009 10:40:03 PM
wow 13!!!! that is so young

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